the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Randomize