i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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