JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize