part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize
