One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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