nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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