I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
