stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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