I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
