No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
