This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize