ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
