That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
