i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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