yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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