Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
