is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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