just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
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