that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
