You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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