remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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