I think i sorta joined a cult last night
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
