so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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