I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
