I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
