Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You are a genius and a whore.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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