I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
