I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
This is my life. Enjoy the view
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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