i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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