he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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