Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
