you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
