If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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