Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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