Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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