So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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