I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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