i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize