She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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