you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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