Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize