i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?