dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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