you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Randomize
