im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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