Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize