dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
it hurts more in the daytime
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize