I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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