Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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