I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Randomize